The Weight is Gone

“The Weight is Gone”

“Christ, having been offered once to bear the sins of many, will appear a second time, not to deal with sin but to save those who are eagerly waiting for him.” Hebrews 9:28

I was a paperboy. If you have a mental picture of the archetype 12 year-old boy carefully balancing two bags of newspapers on his ten year-old bicycle, your imagination would come close to my youth from sixth grade through the first half of high school. I delivered the Oakland Herald Examiner for three years and the Contra Costa Times through a good part of high school.


It was a struggle learning to balance 50 pounds of newsprint while riding my old Schwinn single-speed and sheer tedium sliding the inserts into the paper, then folding and closing them with rubber bands. If I got distracted, I would practice my rubber band skills on flies that landed nearby. Beyond that, I had to memorize my route of 50 to 60 customers and go door to door each month to collect their subscription price for the paper. We delivered in the afternoon, except for Saturday and Sunday when the alarm woke me at 5 am. The Sunday edition was twice as large as any other and I usually had to make two trips to carry them all.

It was during this time that I took up smoking. I don’t know when I first tried a cigarette, but it was somewhere in the whirl of junior high school, I am sure. At first it was a cigarette offered by a friend, barely inhaling and never carrying my own. Eventually, though, I was a regular smoker throughout the last part of high school. 

Because I was under eighteen I had to be creative in ways to get my smokes. Usually it was as simple as asking an older friend, who would charge extra for purchasing a pack of Camels for me. So, what was sold for 50c at the convenience store cost me 75c. And, to my shame, if I was entirely out, I would look for unlocked cars during my early morning paper deliveries, hoping to find stray packs inside. I am ashamed to admit I stole, but back then I was nearly as ashamed over having to smoke Virginia Slims, because that’s all I could find.

As good parents do, mine regularly asked about the scary parts of my life. “Have you ever used marijuana? Are you smoking?” I would always answer “No” to the smoking question. It was foolish for a couple of reasons. First, my parents had always said that if I wanted to try cigarettes, just let them know, and they would let me…outside. But, more foolish, there is no question they could smell the smoke all over my clothes after I came in from my route. Since I covered a neighborhood a half mile from where we lived, I felt safe with a cigarette hanging out of my mouth as I tossed Mr. and Mrs. Tolbert’s paper on their porch. (I was a good aim, by the way.)

It never bothered me about the smoking. I was fairly intelligent and I think I always knew it was a habit that I would not take into adulthood. Knowing its affects on the body, I was not going to chance long-term addiction. But, lying to my parents killed me. I hated it. Of course, my lies covered other areas than just cigarettes. Sadly, I never found the wherewithal while still young to admit my untruths.

But that is only one of the sins I carried like a dead weight around my neck. I tried to ignore it, as if my lies and other behaviors really hurt no one. But that really wasn’t the point. I was dishonest; dishonest for selfish reasons. Like it or not, as nice a guy as I was, I was making every decision based on staying out of trouble.
I am just one guy! Scripture tells us Jesus was “offered once to bear the sins of many”. Every one of my sins, plus the other 5,999,999,999 people now alive, plus everyone who came before; all of their sins as well were borne by Jesus. Think of the worst moment when you felt the weight of your misdeeds. Now think of the weight of all your misdeeds, and then, that weight times 6 billion or more! Yet, that was Jesus’ choice. All He asks is we come clean just once, and allow Him to cleanse us inside and out…because He has already 
paid the price for those sins Himself!

Just as He came the first time to give Himself over to the dead-weight of sin, Jesus is returning again…soon. This time it is to save all of those who are eagerly waiting for Him. I am so glad that all is forgiven, and my home is with Father-God. Jesus calls us all to lay down the burden of our constant failings and accept His cure and forgiveness. We can then wait excitedly for the day He returns and we leave this old person, so preoccupied with self, behind.