A Silent Decade

A Silent Decade

(“Then God told him, ‘I will certainly be with you, and this is the proof that I am the one who is sending you: When you have led the people out of Egypt, you shall worship God here upon this mountain!’” Exodus 3:12)

It has been a silent decade, a desert of hearing,
a midnight of seeing and the oceans are grey, the river
is iron,
and the oars do not cut to take me downstream.

You are not to blame, though You speak much softly than I prefer.
If I leave here, if I find a new abode with the same household but
wrapped with connections I’ve missed, how do I know

You will go?

And how do I know

I won’t be missed?

I’m too broken to start anew, too old to venture a capital campaign;
The locusts are in my ears and the wasps are in my head,
the brain waves, though never measured, are surely morse code jazz.

I want to walk the marble halls with my sons; the coffee and scones,
carroty beers and earthen pages of books we found just hours ago.

I want to unload my decades-old burden and walk the Pacific Trail.
ha! I do not move further than from lounger to icebox when blackmailed
by my pain.

I do not move alone. I am tied forever in love. And she has always tagged
along.
But it’s always been my song. And now, when I need a new place, somewhere
to be born again,
I cannot ask her to carry my tune again.

Promise me the rains will fill my longing. Pledge Your presence though my senses
tingle alone. Go or stay, I need a way to be unwrapped completely and unafraid of

The self I’ve always been.

The self I’ve always been.

Listening and Living Well

Listening and Living Well

“Live in me, and I will live in you. A branch cannot produce any fruit by itself. It has to stay attached to the vine. In the same way, you cannot produce fruit unless you live in me.” John 15:4

The news has been overwhelming in the past several weeks. One after another, women have come forward with their stories of sexual assault and harassment in the workplace. Actions that once took place in the shadows are coming to light. As each new victim shares her account it has empowered even more to open up about their experiences as well.

Some of the accused have denied any wrongdoing. At least one released a thoughtful, though perhaps incomplete, apology. Others have used phrases like “if I have offended…”. Many brave women have spoken up, and their stories deserve to be heard.

As followers of Jesus, we are interested in truth. Jesus told us that He is the way, the truth and the life. We are also interested in valuing every person’s life; their humanity, their dignity and their worth. We must never dismiss the story of a victim or make excuses for the perpetrator.

As I’ve read and listened to the stories of many of these women I’ve wondered how well we do as the church in treating women as Jesus did. I also wonder if our structures enhance the role of women or hold them back, if our policies celebrate them or limit them.

Four women have accused a senatorial candidate of sexual abuse at a time when he was in his 30s and they were teenagers. All of the incidents took place about 30 years ago and the girls ranged from 14 to 16 years old. Without getting into the politics, there was one poll that shocked me. A JMC analytics poll found that 37 percent of evangelicals surveyed in that state said the allegations make them more likely to vote for the GOP Senate candidate in the upcoming election.

Jesus honored and elevated women. The church should follow His lead. There is a story about Jesus having dinner with a religious leader. This man would have been among the conservatives of his time, and probably wanted to test Jesus. In those days, when there was an important guest at dinner, people would sometimes stand outside, watching the discussion and meal.

In this case, a prostitute was among those watching. Called a “sinner”, this woman enters the house and walks directly to Jesus. Kneeling at his feet, she empties a bottle of perfume on them, crying and washing his feet with her tears. She then dries his feet with her hair, kissing them over and over again, pouring more perfume on them.

Simon, the religious leader, is deeply offended. “If this man was really a prophet, he would know what type of woman is touching him. She’s a sinner!”

There is another story that is very similar. This time the disciples are offended because the perfume is so expensive, saying the it could have been sold and the money given to the poor. Jesus tells them, “She has anointed my body for burial.”

Mary, the sister of Martha, sits at Jesus’ feet when he comes to visit them in their home. Martha is doing what is expected of women at the time; preparing the meal. Mary breaks out of the presumptive role and takes her place sitting before Jesus…as a disciple. This was unheard of in Jesus’ time. But when Martha complains that Mary is not helping in the kitchen, Jesus says Mary has chosen the “better” part.

Jesus met with an outcast woman, a Samaritan, alone at a well. Men and women were never to meet alone in that society. But, not only did he meet with her, he had one of the most theologically deep conversations recorded in the Gospels. He then sent her back into town to tell everyone about Him.

The very first to discover Jesus had risen from the dead were women, and they were the first to announce it to the male disciples. All of these things happened in a highly patriarchal society. Jesus broke the “norms” because all people deserve respect, dignity and the opportunity to pursue their God-given dreams.

So, let’s listen, and listen well. And, let’s listen like Jesus. Jesus said, “Live in me, and I will live in you.” Life is not produced by letting society squeeze us into its mold. Life is not produced by playing politics over truth. Life is produced as we all seek to keep our connection with Jesus Himself strong and unfettered. Then we will be a healing people. We will respect people, not take advantage of them. We will truly listen to peoples’ stories. And we will fully empower men and women toward their full potential.