Never Sleeps

While a pastor on the Fort Berthold Reservation I was honored with the Indian name, "NeverSleeps". It was primarily because I was often responding to particular needs in the middle of the night.

Even more relevant, the Lord Himself, Maker of all, "Never Sleeps".

Surely you know.
Surely you have heard.
The Lord is the God who lives forever,
who created all the world.
He does not become tired or need to rest.
No one can understand how great his wisdom is.

Isaiah 40:28

Welcome to every reader. I am a simple follower of Jesus. He is perfect, I often fall short.

Tuesday, March 31, 2015

All I Want

All I Want
“All I want is to know Christ and the power that raised him from death. I want to share in his sufferings and be like him even in his death. Then there is hope that I myself will somehow be raised from death.” Philippians 3:10, 11

“All I want...”. It makes me think of the silly Christmas song, “All I Want for Christmas are My Two Front Teeth.” When the bite of winter is in the air and people are log-jamming their way through retail store aisles, we ask “What do you want?” Our middle son, Jonathan, is great at putting a very specific list together for us each year. I’m the worst. “Could I have a two-week vacation in Paris, please?” Of course, no one passing out gifts in my house has the resources to provide such a gift. I usually say, “You know, I’m not really sure.” So, our daughter buys me fashion, our oldest son; books or music, and Jonathan, well, I never know what he will give; but I’m always pleasantly surprised.

Monday, March 30, 2015

Everything I Need

Everything I Need

(So, my Christian brothers, when you come together to eat the Lord's supper, wait on your turn.” 1 Corinthians 11:33)

Everything I find, under my feet, over my head,
everything I need, into my heart, words never said,
everything, everything,
I find  in the silences, in the spaces between columns and
walls, in the unseen hollows and the songs yet sung,
everything, everything is sweeter to my ear,
more savory to my tongue because
It comes first from You to me.

I can wait until the Amen’s final sustain,
I can believe beauty inhabits delay,
sense indwells the crazy way a storm
piles up on the horizon moments after the
sunniest day.
I will watch Your eyes until the capture me,
I will look to Your hands until you embrace me,
I will know, though my “whys” increase,
I will hope, though the sighs release so little pain
they build upon each other, sigh, and another,
sigh, and breathe; sigh, believe; sigh, upheaval
from the hot spear that never cools; sigh until the

Breath is so large it fills the room; a sigh that
has grown, the sighing, the groaning, the hands
both covering my brow, in some way hoping to
kill the courier of agony somehow.


But still, storm and pain, crash and insane,
everything I need is worth the wait until
I see as I am seen,
and believe every crooked way has
been made straight.

Monday, March 16, 2015

I am Owned

I am Owned

(“Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God, and that you are not your own?” 1 Corinthians 6:19)

Companion of all I am, my questions and vague answers,
my soft lawn and burning sand; sojourn here where dancers
sometimes brighten the day, and; where blisters enhance the limp
I’ve carried from the first day I insisted on allowing You to stay.

You are stubborn, pulling me like magnetic migrants to rubble and storms;
You are gentle, showing me the tears that fall for urbans and farms;
You are stronger, still I must follow, you do not drive or strike me;
You are fiery, breaking the ice jams, burning my first plans and my psyche

Until I own that I am owned. I browse no longer, the window shopping is over,
I am overtaken by love, pulled by black hole wind that insists I fly without trying,
learning the sky and earth, moon and sun, soul and neighbor, all deserve the
best behavior


From a mere visitor upon the Holy One’s Sacred tour.

Saturday, March 14, 2015

Manifest Litter

Manifest Litter

(“Whoever belittles his neighbor lacks sense, but the discerning man controls his comments.” Proverbs 11:12)

The landscape is littered with treaties made with
the first nation and its people. Brown and foxing,
burnt around the edges, some from lighting arrogant cigars,
and only a few used to light flaming arrow once the
chiefs and braves
finally understood their true value.

303 Santee were sentenced to be hanged found guilty
by poisonous mouth-talk of rape and murder;
no one stayed to further state the obvious: fierce led
sliced the shoulder blades of the first chief riding to
meet a small army regiment with peaceful hands extended.

303 Santee, with starvation rations and water full of sickness,
waited for the promises, repeated the treaties, a word meant
to say to both parties: We will treat each other this way and no other.

303 Santee, some with ancient wounds and withered arms, were
lodged in a hot log prison, while defense was denied them,
attorneys refused them, and one man believed them

Sending

The words of each trial and hearing, the saliva mixed with ink
as the hated first persons spoke without representation; sending
the entire proceedings to the Great Father, the Great Emancipator

Who read every word, hired great counselors to read every word,
delaying the waiting massacre a moon and another longer than
the captors desired. 39 would hang, said Mr. Lincoln, “Ordered that
of the Indians and half-breeds sentences to be hanged by the military commission
…you cause to be executed on Friday the nineteenth day of December.”

And so the proclamation listed 39 records of the condemned.

Quickly, upon the twenty-sixth of December, thirty-nine of the 303
convicted Santees, were marched from the prison to the scaffold.

They sang the Sioux Death song; original words hung close to frozen ground.

Soldiers pulled white caps over each man’s head; dry snow settled up their shoulders.

Their nooses were placed around their necks; now the death day had no more sound, no more breath.

The control rope was cut; an army officer gave the command, the last man to act on their behalf

And

39 minus one (a late reprieve for one) lifeless Santee bodies dangled lifeless in the air.

The prairies were stolen, men were burned like potash or frozen from exposure;
the wise, the young, the brave, the fool, were seen as simple savages, Satan’s army

By which a Christian nation would Manifest its Destiny upon broken agreements
and false religion.

38 Santees legs and arms hung as limp as backyard linens on the line. May the
chill still run its line from the scaffold to our own baffled hearts in the same way
one bystander said that day,

“This must be America’s greatest public execution.”


"The Sioux Indians of Minnesota must be exterminated or driven forever beyond the borders of the state."  Minnesota Governor Alexander Ramsey

Saturday, March 7, 2015

A Brief Fog

A Brief Fog

(“By his knowledge the deep waters were divided, and the skies dropped dew.” Proverbs 3:20)

Whatever ideas I had when I awoke, half of them have disappeared with the dawn,
and the fog has cleared to prod a new list of names,
a package of choruses and refrains,
and the same old untamed habits that keep me isolated
on the island inhabited by my sweet wife,
two dogs (one our own, and one a sometimes visitor, our daughter’s very own
“Daisy”; a sweet Chiweenie),
one cat and

My pain.

It visited one Thanksgiving Day, forced the couch underneath me,
with the weight of an iron TopHat, I stayed flat on my back and missed
the first invitation for turkey, gravy and the best homemade cranberry sauce;
and six Thanksgivings has come and gone; the uninvited visitor is now
a nuisance and not a guest.


Days like these I would drive to the refuge, watch for the deer,
follow the lines of seals and sea lions swimming upstream.
Like fallen logs their nostrils bounce above the water line,
sniffing like dogs for a bone. Sniffing for salmon to bring
home (hated by the fisherman who net the salmon to bring
home.)