"I'll Catch Up With You Later"

“And said, ‘Let us break camp and travel on together; I will accompany you.’” Genesis 33:12

Jacob and Esau are the classical portrait of the consequences of deceit and one-upmanship in a family. Esau is the older of the two twins and should have received the birthright due the first born. But, in the famously told story, he sells it off for a “pottage of lentils”; bean soup.

Jacob deceives their father into giving him the right of inheritance instead of the older Esau. At his mother’s urging he dresses himself as his brother, hunts prey and prepares his father’s favorite meal. Disguising himself was not difficult, seeing his father was nearly blind.

After Jacob has surreptitiously stolen the blessing, Esau discovers it. He pleads with his father for a blessing as well, but the father has already given his word. He cannot relent. The die is cast; the future is set in stone. A father’s blessing is paramount to an unalterable contract.

Jacob’s mother encourages him to run away, now that Esau has discovered their plot and is murderously angry. The two brothers, nearly as close as physically possible, wander opposite sides of the expansive Middle East.

Until the fateful day that Jacob and Esau’s entourages meet up with each other. When Jacob receives word that his brother wants to meet with him, he is driven to fear. He hatches a plan to pacify his brother, secures his family, and begs God for mercy and a blessing. It is now Jacob doing the begging; not before his earthly father, but before God in heaven.

After wrestling with an angel and a dialogue in which Jacob’s name is changed to Israel, the Scripture reads, “And He blessed him there.” The entire story is wrought with grace. Otherwise it is simply familial intrigue, unfairness and sorrow. But God always has a different agenda than our own.

Having received God’s promise to bless him, Jacob finally meets up with Esau. If I was writing the story I would tie it up nicely in a ribbon and bow. Esau would bow before Jacob’s apology, Jacob would make amends for every foul, and the brothers would spend their twilight years smoking pipes on the front porch laughing at their earlier chicanery.

It starts to seem that way. Esau invites Jacob to join his caravan, saying, “Let us break camp and travel on together; I will accompany you.” Esau, the wronged brother, not only says “let’s travel together” but also invites Jacob to decide where to go. But Jacob declines.

Theology makes much of Jacob’s decision. Since he is the one with the “blessing” both from God and from their father, some say it was not wise for him to accompany Esau. Though, as brothers, they might do well to reestablish their relationship, Esau’s non-grace influence on Jacob’s new found grace could have been catastrophic. And, even Paul the apostle makes the “grace” “non-grace” argument using the two boys in Romans 9.

What struck me, though, is the seeming distrust Jacob has about the reunion with Esau. God has blessed Jacob, purely out of grace, not because Jacob has earned a thing. Esau, as well, has been very gracious to Jacob. But Jacob not only turns down Esau’s invitation to travel together, he lies as to his reasons.

I’m not going to condone deceit here, but I wonder how many of us have excused ourselves from something with a less than perfect reason. “I’m just not feeling well” means, “I don’t think I’d feel comfortable at that meeting.” As good as grace is, Jacob still struggled with the issues between Esau and himself.

The conclusion to be drawn? How should I know, I’m just observing! Seriously, here’s what blesses me. God’s grace is as resident within Jacob when he turns down his brother’s invitation deceitfully as when he had wrestled with God an entire night previously.

We are so prone to want to moralize every Biblical narrative that sometimes we don’t just let the story live on its own. God met Jacob and blessed him. Esau was finally at a place to reconcile. Jacob was gracious also, but still afraid and concocted a reason to stay behind, promising to “catch up later”. And, of course, he never does.

The star is not how much Esau had changed or how undeceitful Jacob now was. The star is God and His desire to bless. We can draw the theological conclusions about God’s sovereign choice of Jacob over Esau. We do no injustice to do that. As has already been pointed out, Paul makes just that comparison.

Today, though, I am simply grateful for God’s grace in those times when I may fear what I should not fear. God has met me, my enemies may be ready to make peace, but I still feel compelled to keep someone at arms distance. Not even because I want to. Who can explain that dizzy feeling when facing a situation that is nearly phobic in nature?

God, please let Your blessing remain upon me, even though, like Jacob, I feel I must excuse myself from certain situations. I am sure, with greater faith, or more understanding of the depth of Your grace, that I could manage to overcome certain anxieties. But, today, to this date, I am simply relying on Your grace which shows up whether I have overcome my phobias or not.