And Perhaps

And Perhaps

(“Whoever wants to save his life will give up true life. But whoever gives up his life for me and for the Good News will have true life forever.” Mark 8:35)

Protective, my sentences are guarded;

defensive, my paragraphs precise;
wrestling, I accept few invitations;
guessing, my statements entice
more questions.

Few understand my occasional stutters,
unplanned conversation is quicksand.
Words are ammunition; mouths, keyboards,
pens and paper blaze with fiery offense
the surer I am

All the world is a neighborhood
and not
a conflagration of gangs and nations.

The poorer I am
of the certainties that
every earthly rubric
has a higher and conflicting rule
of peace by laying down our swords,
and taking up

Our neighbor’s plowshares, across the street,
the stream, the river, the border

And making matters worse

Expecting to speak well of life through dying,
that my best thoughts still keep me
one step inside the line

That Jesus would have me cross
in time to heaven’s tempo, at, perhaps
my own personal loss.